While I was getting my pjs on tonight and thinking about my day I was wondering how people take me. What I mean is that sometimes I say things, and then hours later think, wow did I really say that. I hope that I didn't offend anyone or that they didn't take it the wrong way. I guess that sometimes I just don't know how to filter very well and say things that I don't really mean or they just come out different than what I'm saying in my head. This is the reason Matt didn't talk to me the morning of Mothers Day. I lost my filter and said something wrong.
Tonight the boys and I went to my sister-in-laws for a Creative Memories party. I was asked where on the Autism Spectrum Adam was. It was a question from someone who has a child that is being tested for Aspergers. It was a great question and I'm not the type to be offended by things. My answer is that he has Autism however he is potty trained and his is vocal but doesn't communicate well. So maybe my answer wasn't that great. I was really kind of caught off guard with this. No one has ever asked me this before so I really didn't know how to answer. My SIL was quick to jump in and say that Adam is higher on the spectrum than a child with Aspergers. I really sounded like a fool. I mean really who just jumps in and says "Well he uses the toilet and can talk." Okay, maybe I didn't use those exact words but that what I was thinking while getting my pjs on. I can't believe that I would say something like this. This woman is going through testing for her son and here I am making light of it as ususal. Sometimes I forget that some people are just starting this journey and that in the beginning you want to hide from it and everyone. That some days you question God on why this is happening. I've never been a "why me God?" person. I'm not that way now, but for a short period of time I was. I know that His plan was for Adam to be mine. I'm so very thankful that He gave me this child. I do however sometimes forget how hard it is for a parent when they are just starting this whole ASD thing. A while later Adam called me to look at his tooth because it was bleeding. He sat down on the couch and I was telling him that I would take him to the dentist. Both my sisters-in-law were telling him how they go to the dentist and he started yelling at them to stop talking to him. I'm thinking that maybe the woman who asked about the spectrum just might know where he falls now.
After reading this I was reminded how when a someone told me that they got a diagnoses I was happy. I actually said "Oh thats great." I mean who says that?!?! What I should have said was "Finally you got some answers. Do you have any questions? " or " This was helpful for me..." No I was all smiley and happy that she got a diagnoses. I guess I'm a glass half full kind of person.
Oh and I also want to take a quick moment to say sorry about my bad grammer and poor spelling. I was reading some of my posts and WOW there's a lot of mistakes. Please keep in mind that I write when I really should be in bed so I don't really pay much attention to the mistakes. So it 12:10am and I have to be at the playground at 8:30am for tee ball pics so I guess I better get off here.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Slow down.
My last couple weeks have been really REALLY really busy so no postings lately. I guess it's time to get started agian.
My Mothers day was eventfull. Not the worst Mothers Day ever but it was the second. The worst was the weekend that I had Ben and he had to be transfered from St. Charles to St. V's. He never pooped after being born on Friday and by Sunday it was time to move him. That's really another story for a different time. Anyway, Mothers Day this year started out with my husband not talking to me. Then we went to my parents house and my Dad passes out. He does do this often. However this time he stopped breathing so that was different. The firemen came and then the EMT's. God bless the Petersburg Fire Department and all of their wives and Mothers who share them on Holidays and Mothers Day! When my mom and I got to the ER we had to wait for a LONG time before we could see him. Guess he did the samething after he got to the hospital. His blood pressure was very low and the nurse was staying with him to monitor it. After 5 hours of the ER they got him into the ICU. It was about 8:00 when I then called Matt to come and get me. About 5 minutes after I called him, he called me back. His sister was very sick and the called 911. My bad day just got worse! My husbands family is very very close. I fell in love with them all right away. I've always been part of the family and they have always made it easy for me. At this point my head was just spinning. At the same time the nurse came in to tell us that my grandparents were there to see Dad so me, my brother and sister-in-law had to go so they could come in. By then Matt should be there to get me so I went outside to wait. We then traded places and he went to the hospital with his sister and I stayed wiht the boys. So that was my Mothers Day. Oh yeah, my brother bought me lunch/dinnner at the hospital so that was my BIG treat!
After all this excitement came the hard part. I never mentioned that my boys were with my dad when he passed out. They were there when my mother was shaking and saying over and over that he was dying. She has never been this scared or upset when this happends to him. My sis-in-law and I joke that we have to be the most cruel family out there because when he passes out now we just give him a blanket and wait for him to wake up. This sounds very harsh but he has been doing this now for about 5 years and the doctors don't know what is wrong. So as I was saying my boys were with him and now they heard Grandma say he was dying. They were scared! Adam was crying and kept rocking and started flapping his hands. That is something he hasn't done in a long time. Ben and Josh were just scared. They didn't cry but they didn't want to stay in the house. They wanted to watch to make sure Gramps was okay. They watched the firemen come. They watched the EMTs leave with Gramps and now they are watching Meema cry. That also never happends. My mom is a very strong person. She NEVER lets anyone see her cry! Now they are with Matt at their other grandmas and they get a call that something is wrong at Aunt Na's. Have I mentioned that my husband is the BEST! He never let the kids know that anything was really wrong. He just said that Aunt Na had to go to the doctor and that He was going to go too. After they picked me up and Matt left the questions started to come. Most of them came from Josh. He is a very chatty child and wants to know everything. In the end Aunt Na was okay and got to come home. Gramps spent four days in ICU. He came home but was still looking very gray. The boys wanted to be at Meema's very day last week, but couldn't. Gramps needed his rest. They are now starting to slow down with the questions. They haven't really talked about it much in the last couple days. Ben did stay with them on Friday night and that helped. He could see that Gramps was doing better.
So I had a very busy week last week and now things are starting to slow down. Yeah, RIGHT!!! It's never slow around here! So now I will go finish preping the kitchen for paint and get the laundry started and get the bathrooms cleaned and get the camper ready for next weekend and....
Did I mention that we were at the Urgent Care last night with Ben?!?!?!? Maybe someday my life will slow down and I can breath, but I really don't think so.
My Mothers day was eventfull. Not the worst Mothers Day ever but it was the second. The worst was the weekend that I had Ben and he had to be transfered from St. Charles to St. V's. He never pooped after being born on Friday and by Sunday it was time to move him. That's really another story for a different time. Anyway, Mothers Day this year started out with my husband not talking to me. Then we went to my parents house and my Dad passes out. He does do this often. However this time he stopped breathing so that was different. The firemen came and then the EMT's. God bless the Petersburg Fire Department and all of their wives and Mothers who share them on Holidays and Mothers Day! When my mom and I got to the ER we had to wait for a LONG time before we could see him. Guess he did the samething after he got to the hospital. His blood pressure was very low and the nurse was staying with him to monitor it. After 5 hours of the ER they got him into the ICU. It was about 8:00 when I then called Matt to come and get me. About 5 minutes after I called him, he called me back. His sister was very sick and the called 911. My bad day just got worse! My husbands family is very very close. I fell in love with them all right away. I've always been part of the family and they have always made it easy for me. At this point my head was just spinning. At the same time the nurse came in to tell us that my grandparents were there to see Dad so me, my brother and sister-in-law had to go so they could come in. By then Matt should be there to get me so I went outside to wait. We then traded places and he went to the hospital with his sister and I stayed wiht the boys. So that was my Mothers Day. Oh yeah, my brother bought me lunch/dinnner at the hospital so that was my BIG treat!
After all this excitement came the hard part. I never mentioned that my boys were with my dad when he passed out. They were there when my mother was shaking and saying over and over that he was dying. She has never been this scared or upset when this happends to him. My sis-in-law and I joke that we have to be the most cruel family out there because when he passes out now we just give him a blanket and wait for him to wake up. This sounds very harsh but he has been doing this now for about 5 years and the doctors don't know what is wrong. So as I was saying my boys were with him and now they heard Grandma say he was dying. They were scared! Adam was crying and kept rocking and started flapping his hands. That is something he hasn't done in a long time. Ben and Josh were just scared. They didn't cry but they didn't want to stay in the house. They wanted to watch to make sure Gramps was okay. They watched the firemen come. They watched the EMTs leave with Gramps and now they are watching Meema cry. That also never happends. My mom is a very strong person. She NEVER lets anyone see her cry! Now they are with Matt at their other grandmas and they get a call that something is wrong at Aunt Na's. Have I mentioned that my husband is the BEST! He never let the kids know that anything was really wrong. He just said that Aunt Na had to go to the doctor and that He was going to go too. After they picked me up and Matt left the questions started to come. Most of them came from Josh. He is a very chatty child and wants to know everything. In the end Aunt Na was okay and got to come home. Gramps spent four days in ICU. He came home but was still looking very gray. The boys wanted to be at Meema's very day last week, but couldn't. Gramps needed his rest. They are now starting to slow down with the questions. They haven't really talked about it much in the last couple days. Ben did stay with them on Friday night and that helped. He could see that Gramps was doing better.
So I had a very busy week last week and now things are starting to slow down. Yeah, RIGHT!!! It's never slow around here! So now I will go finish preping the kitchen for paint and get the laundry started and get the bathrooms cleaned and get the camper ready for next weekend and....
Did I mention that we were at the Urgent Care last night with Ben?!?!?!? Maybe someday my life will slow down and I can breath, but I really don't think so.
Friday, April 29, 2011
This may be the start of...
Before I really get started tonight I need to let everyone know that I'm not a "poor me" kind of person. I don't like to have people feel sorry for me or go around looking for sympathy. That being said...
For the last 6 months I've seen a change in Adam. He has always been hard at times to handle, but the last few months have been hard. I always thought that the older he got the easier it would get. I think I may have been wrong. He has a hard time with change and he really don't like it when you try to explan things to him. He wants EVERYTHING his way. That is really hard when you have more than one child in a family. We have been blessed with a wonderful family who helps as much as they can or that we'll let them. Today we went to lunch and I showed Adam the kids menu and told him to find what he wanted to eat. He was not happy about this because I wanted him to read it for himself. He got upset and told me that he couldn't read. I know that he can and I wanted him to read and pick his own food today. I have never done this before and in looking back on the situation I know that is the reason he got so upset. He then started to SPEEK. TO. ME. VERY. STERNLY. and wave his hand at me. Now this is something that he does often and we are trying to get him to stop. I put my hand on his arm and told him he needed to stop speeking to me like that. He angery pushed my hand away and put his head down and started to grumble about not being able to read again. This went on for a few more minutes but then he finally told me what he wanted. Good thing just about every menu has chicken strips on it. He spent the rest of the meal making that really annoying sound that the straw make when your at the end of you drink. However he wasn't at the end, he just likes to make the slurping sound. So the whole time that we were trying to enjoy our rare lunch out, Adam was causing some kind of disturbance. This was nothing like when he used to sit under the table and scream but it has been some time that we've had behavior like this.
Later on the boys and I went to my mother-in-laws. Just so you know I'm very close to her and tell her things that I don't tell my mom or my husband. Adam still is acting up and I hope that he will calm down at grandmas. To make a long story short he yells at me that I don't need to boss him when I tell him to eat the cookie in the kitchen. My sister-in-law is there and trys to help by saying that moms are the boss and he gets very upset with her and thows a piece of his cookie at her. She was surprised! He hasn't really acted like that in front of her before so I think she was shocked. At Easter she asked if this behavior was new because he was just like this then too. I told her it wasn't and that he just hasn't shared it with everyone yet.
I sometimes feel like I can't do this anymore, but then he does something that melts my heart. He is a very sweet boy. He is very polite because I really push the mannors at home. There is truely nothing better then to hear him laugh. His laughter brings joy in our home. I wouldn't change a thing about him but sometimes I feel defeated. He is my special gift from God. For that reason alone I will keep going and I will do the very best I can to teach him about life.
I saved this last night and wasn't sure if I would share it or not. I always feel like peple will think I'm looking for their sympathy and I'm not. Maybe, just maybe someone will read this and know what it's like. Matt has a friend that is a child psychologist and works wiht many Autistic kids. She told him last night that this may be the start of puberty, and it could get worse. I can only pray that God gives me strength for the next few years!
For the last 6 months I've seen a change in Adam. He has always been hard at times to handle, but the last few months have been hard. I always thought that the older he got the easier it would get. I think I may have been wrong. He has a hard time with change and he really don't like it when you try to explan things to him. He wants EVERYTHING his way. That is really hard when you have more than one child in a family. We have been blessed with a wonderful family who helps as much as they can or that we'll let them. Today we went to lunch and I showed Adam the kids menu and told him to find what he wanted to eat. He was not happy about this because I wanted him to read it for himself. He got upset and told me that he couldn't read. I know that he can and I wanted him to read and pick his own food today. I have never done this before and in looking back on the situation I know that is the reason he got so upset. He then started to SPEEK. TO. ME. VERY. STERNLY. and wave his hand at me. Now this is something that he does often and we are trying to get him to stop. I put my hand on his arm and told him he needed to stop speeking to me like that. He angery pushed my hand away and put his head down and started to grumble about not being able to read again. This went on for a few more minutes but then he finally told me what he wanted. Good thing just about every menu has chicken strips on it. He spent the rest of the meal making that really annoying sound that the straw make when your at the end of you drink. However he wasn't at the end, he just likes to make the slurping sound. So the whole time that we were trying to enjoy our rare lunch out, Adam was causing some kind of disturbance. This was nothing like when he used to sit under the table and scream but it has been some time that we've had behavior like this.
Later on the boys and I went to my mother-in-laws. Just so you know I'm very close to her and tell her things that I don't tell my mom or my husband. Adam still is acting up and I hope that he will calm down at grandmas. To make a long story short he yells at me that I don't need to boss him when I tell him to eat the cookie in the kitchen. My sister-in-law is there and trys to help by saying that moms are the boss and he gets very upset with her and thows a piece of his cookie at her. She was surprised! He hasn't really acted like that in front of her before so I think she was shocked. At Easter she asked if this behavior was new because he was just like this then too. I told her it wasn't and that he just hasn't shared it with everyone yet.
I sometimes feel like I can't do this anymore, but then he does something that melts my heart. He is a very sweet boy. He is very polite because I really push the mannors at home. There is truely nothing better then to hear him laugh. His laughter brings joy in our home. I wouldn't change a thing about him but sometimes I feel defeated. He is my special gift from God. For that reason alone I will keep going and I will do the very best I can to teach him about life.
I saved this last night and wasn't sure if I would share it or not. I always feel like peple will think I'm looking for their sympathy and I'm not. Maybe, just maybe someone will read this and know what it's like. Matt has a friend that is a child psychologist and works wiht many Autistic kids. She told him last night that this may be the start of puberty, and it could get worse. I can only pray that God gives me strength for the next few years!
Friday, April 22, 2011
My love...
Ok I have a confession to make. This is one that many of you may already know but I don't just go around telling everyone. I have a love. It's oatmeal. I really, truely, deeply love oatmeal. I eat it almost everyday. My boys also love oatmeal. These days my husband even gets in on the pleasure of it. He has taken a container of it to work to leave in his locker. I don't buy the little packets because it doesn't last long enough. We need the big tub of oatmeal at our house. About a month ago I got caught eating it, uncooked, right out of the container.
This love started as a kid. My mom usually made us breakfast every morning. On school days it was always something easy like eggs or a hot cereal. My brother loved Cocoa Wheats. Mom likes Cream of Wheat with some peanut butter mixed in. It really is good, kind of like Peanut Butter Captain Crunch. I, however, loved oatmeal day. It was best on a cold, snowy morning. Mom always put in some brown sugar and a little milk. Now it's brown sugar and cinnamon. I can remember getting up and heading to the kitchen in my Strawberry shortcake nightgown and having the warm bowl waiting for me.
So why am i going on about oatmeal? I really have no idea other than it's what me and the boys ate for dinner. Kind of strange I know. My husband had already left for work and the kids were getting hungry. I had just had a really crazy week and now Josh was not feeling well. You know what that means...easiest, fastest, meal I could find. OATMEAL! Not really the first thing you think of when you think breakfast for dinner. I know, but its fast, hot and very heathy! I truely think that oatmeal is one of the main reason the I don't have a cholesterol problem. I mean really anyone who knows my family knows it all about the beef!
So that is my confession! I have a love affair with oatmeal, and now the rest of my family is becoming hook as well.
For some crazy reason I was just reminded of the Life cereal commercal from the '80's with Mikey.
Anyway, here's to all my oatmeal eating friends and your healthy hearts!!
This love started as a kid. My mom usually made us breakfast every morning. On school days it was always something easy like eggs or a hot cereal. My brother loved Cocoa Wheats. Mom likes Cream of Wheat with some peanut butter mixed in. It really is good, kind of like Peanut Butter Captain Crunch. I, however, loved oatmeal day. It was best on a cold, snowy morning. Mom always put in some brown sugar and a little milk. Now it's brown sugar and cinnamon. I can remember getting up and heading to the kitchen in my Strawberry shortcake nightgown and having the warm bowl waiting for me.
So why am i going on about oatmeal? I really have no idea other than it's what me and the boys ate for dinner. Kind of strange I know. My husband had already left for work and the kids were getting hungry. I had just had a really crazy week and now Josh was not feeling well. You know what that means...easiest, fastest, meal I could find. OATMEAL! Not really the first thing you think of when you think breakfast for dinner. I know, but its fast, hot and very heathy! I truely think that oatmeal is one of the main reason the I don't have a cholesterol problem. I mean really anyone who knows my family knows it all about the beef!
So that is my confession! I have a love affair with oatmeal, and now the rest of my family is becoming hook as well.
For some crazy reason I was just reminded of the Life cereal commercal from the '80's with Mikey.
Anyway, here's to all my oatmeal eating friends and your healthy hearts!!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Stir the cookie dough.
I always thought that my parents would be the type to play and be active with my children. At 60 and 62 they should be young enough right?! I wanted my children to have the type of grandparents that are in books. The type that are always happy and play all the time. The type that let you break the eggs and stir the cookie dough.
About 5 years ago my dad had a stroke. It wasn't a bad one at all. He was in the hospital for about three days and then seemed fine. He went back to work right away and was feeling great. The week after he had another only this time he didn't bounce back as fast. He had to stop working. That was like taking part of his soul. He is diabetic so he had problems before. For the last five years everything has gotten worse.
My mom has scoliosis (lucky me that I get to have it too) and has a lot of pain. She trys to do as much as she can, but that isn't much anymore. She also has a bad heart. She puts up with a lot from my dad. He's kind of a pain sometimes.
My in-laws are older than my parents, not by much. My father-in-law is also diabetic and my mother-in-law has a bad heart too. However they do a LOT more "fun" things with the boys. They took care of the boys in the summer when I worked. I would come home and they would be playing tag in the back yard. They made up a game that they called "Wicked Witch" and grandma would be the witch. She loved playing that game. One time she had a friend over. Adam told her that Grandma was "the wicked witch" and she was shocked until it was explained. Lately they too have been sick and not as active.
I always thought that our children would be much older when our parents stopped being so active. I guess I was wrong. I know that they will always try to have as much fun as possible with they're grandkids. I also know that a good game of "Wicked Witch" is in the mix soon. We have been blessed to have the parents that we have. They would do anything we needed them to do. I have so much more that I could say about them but today starts our spring break and my family is outside waiting on me.
About 5 years ago my dad had a stroke. It wasn't a bad one at all. He was in the hospital for about three days and then seemed fine. He went back to work right away and was feeling great. The week after he had another only this time he didn't bounce back as fast. He had to stop working. That was like taking part of his soul. He is diabetic so he had problems before. For the last five years everything has gotten worse.
My mom has scoliosis (lucky me that I get to have it too) and has a lot of pain. She trys to do as much as she can, but that isn't much anymore. She also has a bad heart. She puts up with a lot from my dad. He's kind of a pain sometimes.
My in-laws are older than my parents, not by much. My father-in-law is also diabetic and my mother-in-law has a bad heart too. However they do a LOT more "fun" things with the boys. They took care of the boys in the summer when I worked. I would come home and they would be playing tag in the back yard. They made up a game that they called "Wicked Witch" and grandma would be the witch. She loved playing that game. One time she had a friend over. Adam told her that Grandma was "the wicked witch" and she was shocked until it was explained. Lately they too have been sick and not as active.
I always thought that our children would be much older when our parents stopped being so active. I guess I was wrong. I know that they will always try to have as much fun as possible with they're grandkids. I also know that a good game of "Wicked Witch" is in the mix soon. We have been blessed to have the parents that we have. They would do anything we needed them to do. I have so much more that I could say about them but today starts our spring break and my family is outside waiting on me.
Monday, April 18, 2011
So here it goes.....
So here I am starting another blog. As if I'm a veteran blogger or something. I started one last week and didn't care for the site so now I'm trying another. I've never really written anything that I have let others read but I figure that maybe it'll be cheeper than going to therpy. I have three sons and that alone is a reason to see a shrink....however my oldest is Autistic and my second has ADHD. My third they say is fine but I really question their judgment.(sarcasm is my friend). No really my youngest, Josh, is a "normal" kid. He is very bossy and likes to think he runs the house but what can I say, he's just like his mother!
So if any of you know a kid with Autism you know that they are all different and that one thing they REALLY don't like is change. Well...last night it was time for the boys to get ready for bed. I told them all that it was time to get in the shower.
Adam is ALWAYS first. Ben, my second, got in first. Adam had a meltdown. They are not a violent as they used to be. Now he just runs though the house screamming and yelling.
We have new neighbors. Maybe I should let them in on this before they call the police and tell them we are beating our children.
The next thing I know Josh is getting in the shower with Ben and Adam is now screaming and crying and saying that they are mean to him. REALLY?!?!?! Most boys don't fight over who gets to take a shower first. Most boys say they don't want to shower at all. So I get the other two out of the shower, dressed and him in. As soon as he gets in the water he forgets about how he was not first tonight and calms down as if nothing ever happened. After I got them in bed I sat down at my computer to write but I quickly found that I reallyhated my blog and that I needed to find a new site. So here it goes...
So if any of you know a kid with Autism you know that they are all different and that one thing they REALLY don't like is change. Well...last night it was time for the boys to get ready for bed. I told them all that it was time to get in the shower.
Adam is ALWAYS first. Ben, my second, got in first. Adam had a meltdown. They are not a violent as they used to be. Now he just runs though the house screamming and yelling.
We have new neighbors. Maybe I should let them in on this before they call the police and tell them we are beating our children.
The next thing I know Josh is getting in the shower with Ben and Adam is now screaming and crying and saying that they are mean to him. REALLY?!?!?! Most boys don't fight over who gets to take a shower first. Most boys say they don't want to shower at all. So I get the other two out of the shower, dressed and him in. As soon as he gets in the water he forgets about how he was not first tonight and calms down as if nothing ever happened. After I got them in bed I sat down at my computer to write but I quickly found that I reallyhated my blog and that I needed to find a new site. So here it goes...
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